Butt Seriously Folks
Who says you can't judge a cd by its cover? Lots of the songs here aren't found anywhere else - Butt Seriously Folks is serious shit! New Years Eve 1999, You Can't Say/You Can Say (from the studio!), Lucy in the Sky (this one is the ass-kicker), and Wide Open are my favorites.

Cherry Poppin' In Grand Rapids
Recorded at the ORBIT Room in Grand Rapids, Michigan in October 1997. Who needs Live At Leeds when you have a live Valby show? Different versions of all of his songs.

WWW.VALBY.CUM
John Valby's Internet Album. It came out in 1998, when the Internet was the only thing people were talking about, so lots of the jokes have to do with the Internet. There are also 3 computer songs at the end - Valby shows us he could rule the computer world too if he wanted to! The Candle in the Wind tribute to Mama Cass is brilliant. American Pie is sick ("Why, why did my dog have to die? That retriever had a beaver that would never go dry..") Pecker Tingling is the closest Valby gets to feel-good pop.

Double Valby
Two albums in one! Don't Go Soft On Me Now and Your Face Or Mine. Ain't No Pussy, the racist songs, and the shocking version of La Bamba (Mexicans - "My family died in a box car..") are the best tunes here.

Double-D CD
Tears In Heaven, Always A Woman, Puff The Magic Tampon (one of his best songs - "Puff the magic tampon, lived between her knees, and froliced in that awful mist in the land of yeast and cheese.."), and 50 Ways To Fuck Your Lover are the knee-slappers on this cd with a big cover.

Digital Ditties
The first half of this one looks like the old 70's album, Give Me Dirt Or Give Me Death. That was the first Valby material I'd ever heard. I was in 9th grade and my older brother did me a big favor by letting me hear it. In the 80's it was hard to find this stuff - I went to record stores all over Miami until I found a place willing to order cassettes for me. Luckily, we now have johnvalby.com to get everything we need. Yank My Doodle, Ya-Ya, the Ayatollah Poem (see, Valby was bagging on terrorists since the 70's!), Yo-Ho and Gangbang are my favorites.

The Dirt Poems
This one came out in 2000. Lots of poetry - Ayatollah Poem, Candybar Poem, Beer Poem, American Poem, The Ballad of Big Ass Lil and Yukon Pete, Dog Poem and The Revenge of Big Ass Lil. John Valby, Poet.

Half In The Fucking Bag
Some new stuff here - Brown Eyed, Joy To The World and Those Were The Days. I also like the song This Old Man. A song to grow up with.

Jingle Balls
The world is a better place now that John Valby has a Christmas album. It doesn't get much better than this (and hey, I'm Jewish!). Jingle Balls, Santa Claus Is Coming To Town, White Christmas, Winter Wonderland, Greensleeves, Rum-Pum-Pum (one of his best - "I stick my finger up my rum-pum-pum-pum..), Leroy The Big Lipped Nigger, and The Twelve Days of Christmas. Makes your eyes red just thinkin' about it.

Dr. Dirty's Sphincter Unplugged
I bought this one in New York City on my first visit to the US after September 11 at one of the music stores a few blocks from Ground Zero. This is the only time I've ever been able to go into a music store and see a Valby cd with all the others. I love New York! This one was done with Laugh.com, a cool website. Its full of different versions of classics + a studio session.

The 'Not Yet On CD' CD
A must have! My favorites are Wonderful World, I Am Pussy, Rock Around The Clock, There's a Hush Tonight, Shower Spout (hehe), Bridge Over Troubled Water ("...I'll deny it all, I won't be there, like a bridge over I-95, I will let you down.."), and Scarborough Fair ("Are you going to scar up my dick, circumcize my cute little prick..")

Scratch'n'Sniff
Yet another version of Ya-Ya! And lots of tv show songs.

Super Pixies
Somewhere Under Your Pubies, On The Road Again ("On her back again, my fuckin' wife is on her back again.. When she's on the rag, I'm on the road again.."), White Boys Wish (the Harlem Globetrotters song - "All those white boys wish they had those biiiig nigger dicks..") and more. This is a classic.

Butt Seriously Folks
The Monica cd! "Starr Report, you'll get a boner from the Starr Report.." I like being able to listen to different Valby cds and remember the period of time he's singing about.

Greatest Tits
Wow, what a cover! The Rose is great. So is Ob-La-Di and all the rest of the songs here.

American Troubadour
John Valby's September 11 cd. Lots of patriotic songs. Lots of anti Bin-Laden songs. And Valby even talks a bit. Ron Lombardo, his head writer, gets credit here. They must have a lot of fun writing these songs!

Operation: Fuck Iraq
Valby's Iraq War cd. The front says, "A live, unedited recording of an American bar two days after the statue of Saddam was pulled to the ground and dragged through the streets of Baghdad." It was recorded at Toad's in New Haven, Connecticut. When I was watching the war on tv in my (then) apartment in Jerusalem (with a gas mask nearby), I knew Valby would come up with something cool! For the first time, Valby bags on The Who - with a short song about Pete Townshend's troubles in 2003 sung to the tune of Penny Lane.

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Kenny Sahr kenny@sahr.com